Grandma Ruth

Grandma had been diagnosed with a very aggressive skin cancer almost two years previous, right before I started my first year at St Olaf, and, though it went into remission for a several month stint right afterward, by January of my sophomore year we expected things would go downhill very quickly. In one of her brief breaks at home while we vigiled for Grandma Sue, Mom told me she suspected I would probably lose both Grandmothers in 2006.

Medical timing is such an unpredictable thing. From late January, right before Madrigal Dinner time, we thought surely Grandma Ruth was in her last weeks, and I was saying prayers that nothing would happen during Madrigal weekend.

Then midterms came around. I emailed my teachers to let them know what was happening, and that it might be necessary to make other test arrangements, and on my own I said prayers that nothing would happen on March 23rd, which was the premiere of Fall Into Me (the major film I'd worked on the previous summer).

Midterms came and went, the movie premiere was awesome, and still Grandma was kicking. She had a hospice nurse coming to the house once or twice a week, and Mom and Uncle Mark were spending more time with her to help with meals, but Grandma was still living on her own at home.

But then, in April, it was decided that Grandma's needs were greater than what the family could provide at home, and she moved in to full time hospice care at N C Little Hospice in Edina.

The hospice people were amazingly kind and gentle, and they took as good care of the family as they did for the patient. The family (and Pastor) visited often, and I made sure to make it there every Thursday and Saturday, and then toward the end on Tuesdays as well. The memories I'll hold on to from those visits are actually of my departures, when Grandma would somehow manage enough strength to lift her arm and wave goodbye as I left the room.

And then we were pushing into May, which is finals time at St Olaf. Knowing this time that we actually were in final weeks, I worked diligently, and I finished almost all of my final projects and papers a week early.

5 weeks and 12 hours after she moved into N C Little, Grandma Ruth went Home.

[More about Grandma Ruth's final days can be read as part of my personal blog]

Written in Summer of 2006